the 2018 holiday movie guide, or what to see on christmas when your dad isn’t into nerd stuff

THE TIME IS NEARLY UPON US. Once again, the December multiplexes promise to be a (in some cases) literal ocean of superheroes and Transformers this year, but your Dad is. NOT. INTO IT. Moreover, he did not care for the movie you all picked last year, so he’s feeling extra wary of your tricky, secretContinue reading “the 2018 holiday movie guide, or what to see on christmas when your dad isn’t into nerd stuff”

chasing that hogwarts high, or: okay, FINE, fantastic beasts, you disaster

Sometimes the logistics of the thing is the real joy of the thing. For example, I was so happy this past Wednesday to look up movie times, bundle up in my coat and scarf, and walk a mile and a half in the chilly sunshine to get to the movie theatre. I was equally happyContinue reading “chasing that hogwarts high, or: okay, FINE, fantastic beasts, you disaster”

on the verge of my 30’s, what i learned at sesame street live

The Muppets are mine and my Dads’ love language. And it’s weird, because I’m not even sure how much my Dad really┬álikes The Muppets. If you mention Sesame Street, he’ll just start going on about Roosevelt Franklin, which, to be fair, is a slightly deeper cut than Bert or Ernie. Maybe my Dad’s dorkier thanContinue reading “on the verge of my 30’s, what i learned at sesame street live”

of chainsaw massacres & basement dates

The story which you are about to hear is an account of the tragedy which befell one awkward, horny dork. It is all the more tragic that she was young. But, even as an adult, she could not have expected nor would she have wished to see as much of the mad and macabre asContinue reading “of chainsaw massacres & basement dates”

monster angst and pumpkin coffee

“Make me happy, and I shall again be virtuous.” Everything was sunshine when I first felt the Monster rumble underneath my skin. It’s a glorious morning– warm enough for iced coffee, but October enough for some pumpkin syrup. And there’s a nice breeze in the air and the sun is out and nothing is wrongContinue reading “monster angst and pumpkin coffee”

warm, weird fuzzies in the house with a clock in its walls

Necessary Backstory: In the 4th grade, Jared Thompson’s dad came to visit him at school, and he ate lunch with us in the cafeteria. I remember it well, because it was my favorite elementary school lunch day: Pizza and Mashed Potato Day. See, I liked to spread my mashed potatoes over the top of myContinue reading “warm, weird fuzzies in the house with a clock in its walls

you are enough, or: i still have a lot of feelings about theme park rides

Part of what I like so much about theme parks is that you spend the whole day succeeding. Oh, Optimus Prime needs your help getting the AllSpark? No problem. Spider-Man needs your help taking down the Sinister Six? Nailed it! Doctor Doom needs your help harvesting screams to power Latveria? ON IT, DOOM. (For real.Continue reading “you are enough, or: i still have a lot of feelings about theme park rides”

some dragon con thoughts from an anxious hufflepuff!

Guys, I love Dragon Con. I also have generalized anxiety disorder, so, even within the sparkly, candy-coated joy that is Con, sometimes I want to run away into the deepest bowels of the Hyatt and wait for death to claim me. Dragon Con is loud and intense and sweaty and magical, and that can beContinue reading “some dragon con thoughts from an anxious hufflepuff!”

co-existing in a narrative, or how do you write nonfiction w/o being an asshole?

Personal essays are my favorite kind of writing. When I was first introduced to the work of Chuck Klosterman at the Governor’s Honors Program in 2006, my mind was blown wide open. I didn’t know that you could write about things that really happened to you. I didn’t know that you were allowed to mineContinue reading “co-existing in a narrative, or how do you write nonfiction w/o being an asshole?”

unlikely idols, or: thanks, clay aiken

Prologue, 2003 I’m sitting in my parents’ bedroom, watching American Idol auditions with my mom. It’s all fun and games and Simon Cowell nastiness, and then He walks into the room. Like the judges, Mom and I are immediately skeptical of this gangly, red-haired dork. As a fellow in dorkdom, I’m almost annoyed with him.Continue reading “unlikely idols, or: thanks, clay aiken”

there’s a dumbo trailer!, or the challenges of still being a tim burton fangirl

One of the first VHS tapes that I wore out was The Nightmare Before Christmas. In between the Coming Attractions and the movie itself, the video tape featured a segment, set to bombastic Danny Elfman* music, about the “genius mind” of Tim Burton. I didn’t really know who Tim Burton was, but that segment alwaysContinue reading “there’s a dumbo trailer!, or the challenges of still being a tim burton fangirl”