a promise lives within you now

May it be an evening starShines down upon youMay it be when darkness fallsYour heart will be trueYou walk a lonely roadOh, how far you are from home I think the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life was when I was in middle school and discovering The Lord of the Rings for theContinue reading “a promise lives within you now”

i’m tired (again, part two? i don’t remember)

CW: Being a fucking idiot. (specifically regarding medication) I love you. Go gently. So, I ran out of my meds… I don’t remember when.* *I’M FIXING THIS TOMORROW, I ABSOLUTELY PROMISE. I KNOW THIS IS BAD.* It’s been over a week. Sometimes I get stubborn about them, see. I don’t want them. I don’t wantContinue reading “i’m tired (again, part two? i don’t remember)”

how to rally when you don’t get cast at an international theme park

BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD, NERDS. So, The Thing isn’t happening. I auditioned virtually for Universal Studios Japan and Beijing a few months ago and, honestly, I made it decently far in the proceedings. So, like, good for me. I’m gonna hang on to that. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to auditionContinue reading “how to rally when you don’t get cast at an international theme park”

the decision jar, adventure #1

Yesterday one of my best friends gifted me a magical jar. It is an ordinary (seemingly) mason jar which she’d decorated with yellow ribbon and pretty scrapbooking paper. Inside it there are more scraps of neatly folded pretty paper. I’ve written before about how much I’m struggling with, “Oh, dear God, what should I do?!”Continue reading “the decision jar, adventure #1”

i don’t always know what this is.

Some days it feels like this is all I remember how to do. To start crying from that place of aching emptiness, from the most pitiful pity parties every thrown on this green Earth. I start crying and then I come here to tell you about it. I can’t stop telling you. I know IContinue reading “i don’t always know what this is.”

surprise, surprise; some stuff about depression

I judge myself a lot lately for writing here as frequently as I do. I don’t feel as though I have anything new or exciting or particularly thoughtful to express. I used to think this blog was going to be the beginning of my pathway to writing for io9 or some other cool online nerdContinue reading “surprise, surprise; some stuff about depression”

of dreams and courage (again, always)

Remember who you are. (I’m sorry, Mufasa.) (Also: no, YOU’RE watching Disney fireworks on YouTube and crying in your bathrobe. Get it together. [Don’t. You’re perfect.]) (I miss you. I guess that’s usually why I’m here.) For my 31st birthday, my Dad gave me a framed image of Mickey Mouse and a Walt Disney quote:Continue reading “of dreams and courage (again, always)”