i guess that’s why they call it the blues (thanks, sir elton)

I did not know my body could hold this much sadness. (Somebody said that already, right? Somebody smarter, probably a long time ago? I don’t recall.) I did not know that I could sit at a bakery with the remnants of seasonal vegetable quiche* and latte on my tongue, plants and babies and dogs inContinue reading “i guess that’s why they call it the blues (thanks, sir elton)”

was it you that said, how long?

I was walking home today with an iced dirty chai in my hand and there was just the tiniest hint of a late summer breeze in the air and for the first time in a really long time it seemed like breathing might actually be worth it. Inventory, self, of the twenty-ninth of August: ShortContinue reading “was it you that said, how long?”

i might not get into grad school

My writing sample might not be good enough. My statements of purpose might be a mess. My resume might not be impressive. I might click the wrong button on the application. Maybe my undergrad GPA just isn’t up to snuff. On and on and on. Getting into grad school feels so very high stakes, soContinue reading “i might not get into grad school”

i thank the lord for the people i have found, or: a little more to do about fanfiction

A year ago today, I published my first piece of fanfiction since (probably) middle school. And oh, I AGONIZED over the task of actually writing the damn thing: I would sit on my couch in the dark at night, sipping on sweet fucking Shiraz, and listening to the same love songs over and over andContinue reading “i thank the lord for the people i have found, or: a little more to do about fanfiction”

that shines from you (i’ve probably already used that as a title, haven’t it? dammit, dani)

The plays (for now!) are done! Nothing to write but blogs and fics and grad school essays! How am I coping, you might be wondering? Well, I’ve watched Rocketman three nights in a row, for a starter. Here’s the thing: I just… fucking love this movie. I never expected it to hit me the wayContinue reading “that shines from you (i’ve probably already used that as a title, haven’t it? dammit, dani)”

(i should really be memorizing my lines:)

Writing memoir and personal nonfiction always at first strikes me as… indulgent. Like, how dare I presume that anyone else would care about my sad, silly anecdotes about getting lost in London and eating mozzarella sticks out of trash cans? What is the value of this genre for the reader, you know? I know whyContinue reading “(i should really be memorizing my lines:)”

i’m gay: (just a little thing)

Sort of like a poem, really. Originally posted to Patreon on Halloween 2020: I have spoken it before with uncertainty and fear. Um, I think I might be gay? I have spoken it as an in-advance apology, still figuring things out. I’m really worried I might just be gay. I have whispered it joyfully intoContinue reading “i’m gay: (just a little thing)”